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it's a bit difficult to follow the code blocks above... have you tried something like (untested):
```eks_cluster = Cluster(
  'name',
  node_group_options={
    min_size=0,
    max_size=0,
    desired_capacity=0
  },
  ...
)

ng1 = NodeGroup(
  'name',
  cluster=eks_cluster,
  ...
)```

the issue i was facing is that i prebuilt a dict of the node_group_options and passed them in to the instantiation of both the nodegroup and the cluster

i have changed the code now to first create the cluster using the node_group_options_dict and then add the cluster reference to node_group_options_dict and then create the node_group