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You'll need to provide various parameters as stack references / config values, probably. I do that across 2 projects using stack references and it works fine:
1. _up_ the first project which uses a stack reference from the second project (which doesn't exist, so it returns _undefined_), and export a value,
2. _up_ the 2nd project that uses that exported value via stack reference, and exports the value mentioned in point 1,
3. _up_ the 1st project, which gets the value from point 2, and updates its resource.

You can do this all in one go if you use automation-api.

Just write that code as if it _can_ get all values, and support the case when it _doesn't_ get them all. Pulumi's declarative approach handles everything beyond that.