I have a stack that has an RDS instance and some postgresql entities such as roles and stuff. The RDS instance was deleted manually now I am stuck in limbo because I cannot refresh the state since the postgresql provider can't connect to RDS. Any tips? When I run destroy I get:

postgresql:index:Grant (dev-kable_api_app-grant):
    error: deleting urn:pulumi:dev::kable-infrastructure::custom:resource:DB$postgresql:index/grant:Grant::dev-kable_api_app-grant: 1 error occurred:
        * error detecting capabilities: error PostgreSQL version: dial tcp: lookup <http://dev-db-rds0775ab0.ce3zgd4y8bpu.us-east-1.rds.amazonaws.com|dev-db-rds0775ab0.ce3zgd4y8bpu.us-east-1.rds.amazonaws.com> on 192.168.0.1:53: no such host

When I run refresh I get:

postgresql:index:Database (dev-kable_api-database):
    error: Preview failed: refreshing urn:pulumi:dev::kable-infrastructure::custom:resource:DB$postgresql:index/database:Database::dev-kable_api-database: 1 error occurred:
        * error detecting capabilities: error PostgreSQL version: dial tcp: lookup <http://dev-db-rds0775ab0.ce3zgd4y8bpu.us-east-1.rds.amazonaws.com|dev-db-rds0775ab0.ce3zgd4y8bpu.us-east-1.rds.amazonaws.com> on 205.171.2.25:53: no such host

Is there a way to run a destroy while ignoring failed deletes?