I can stack export and look around. not sure what to edit though

Sounds like you are running a pretty old stack on a mac M1? pulumi-digitalocean 2.6.0 is from Jun 2020. We don't have arm64 binaries for those old releases. Pulumi is trying to download an arm64 binary for that version of the provider and failing. You could update the version to a more recent version and update the stack to have it take effect.